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Art For All: Where Creativity and Wellbeing Intersect

4/15/2026

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Emily Ortiz Badalamente, MA, LCMHC, ATR-BC

Psychotherapist

As an art therapist, I often get the pleasure of hearing about people’s relationship with the word “art.” Some people talk to me about their favorite kind of art or craft. Others tell me about their favorite art projects from school. I hear about favorite museums, wine and paint nights with friends, or experiences like knitting that feel therapeutic and peaceful. It’s one of my favorite topics to discuss with others.

Often, I also hear people say “I’m not good at art.” I hear about how much people loved art class in childhood, but felt discouraged by grades. Or how they try to be creative, but perfectionism gets in the way. For all those who have a positive relationship with art, I meet just as many people who feel that art and creativity are out of reach.

This saddens me, because art and creativity can make us happier and healthier - no matter how “good” we are! A 2016 study showed that short artmaking experiences led to lowered cortisol levels, suggesting lowered stress. This was true regardless of type of artmaking, or if the person had any previous art experience (Kamail et al., 2016). Other studies suggest that enjoying art is linked to higher levels of wellbeing and happiness, as well as potential for lowered hypertension and inflammation (Lee et al., 2024).

This is obviously great for those who enjoy artmaking, or like being around art. But what about those who feel intimidated or bored by art? Because I am an art therapist, you can probably predict what I’m going to say…

Art is for everyone! Creativity is for everyone, and everyone is creative in their own way. I know that the “classic” ways of being creative, like drawing or painting, can often feel intimidating.

Because of this, I like to encourage people to pay attention to creativity that already exists in our everyday lives. Some examples of this are:
  • Choosing a new outfit combination, or dressing to evoke a certain feeling (like dressing “happy” or choosing colors that make you feel confident)
  • Redecorating, or hanging up new art on the walls of your room or home, and noticing how the art you own makes you feel or think
  • Stopping to enjoy a mural, or a creative display in a store window
  • Trying a new recipe, or a new flavor combination when making a meal
  • Decorating your planner pages with stickers or color combinations
  • Arranging your bookshelves in a way that pleases you

When we start to notice where creativity already exists in our lives, we can start to nurture it, and take it even further! If you’re interested in art and creativity, but are maybe unsure of where to start, here are a few ideas:
  • Make a scrapbook or album of photos that are meaningful to you. Choose colors, stickers, and words that connect to the emotions the photo evokes in you.
  • Go on a photo walk, and give yourself a photography theme. Using your camera or phone camera, take pictures of only red items, or only snap photos of leaves. Look up a photography scavenger hunt online to complete while you’re on a walk.
  • Think of art or craft styles that interest you, and look up some tutorials. YouTube and social media can be great resources, but don’t stop there. Make a plan to experiment and find some supplies. Some ideas to look up are tie dying, polymer clay crafts, stampmaking, origami, or paper mache. For some added creativity, try to use materials you might already have on hand!
  • Go see some art! Check out a museum, or look up local galleries to visit. Find murals or public art in your area, and take yourself on a field trip. Ask yourself, what inspires you? What styles, colors, and subjects do you like or dislike?
  • Take a beginning art or craft class. Some great local options in Winston-Salem are Sawtooth School for Visual Arts, Forsyth Tech’s Personal Enrichment Classes, Dabble Art Bar, Art Shac, and Village Fabric Shop.

Whether you are interested in making art, or just appreciating it, I encourage you to nurture your own connection with creativity. It can be a great way to better know yourself, learn new skills, or challenge your worldview. And you might just find ways to feel happier and healthier along the way!
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If you’re interested in going further, and would like to explore how creativity can help you work on your mental health and wellbeing goals, consider working with an art therapist or creative arts therapist. For more information about art therapy, please visit The American Art Therapy Association. To learn more about the creative art therapies, like music therapy, drama therapy, and dance/movement therapy, please visit the National Coalition for the Creative Arts Therapies Associations.

References
Kaimal, G., Ray, K., & Muniz, J. (2016). Reduction of Cortisol Levels and Participants & Responses Following Art Making. Art therapy: Journal of the American Art Therapy Association, 33(2), 74-80. https://doi.org/10.1080/07421656.2016.1166832
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Lee, S. S., Lee, S. H., & Choi, I. (2024). Do art lovers lead happier and even healthier lives? Investigating the psychological and physical benefits of savoring art. Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts, 18(3), 279–286. https://doi.org/10.1037/aca0000441

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Emily Ortiz Badalamente
​Author Emily Ortiz Badalamente is a Board Certified Registered Art Therapist (ATR-BC) and Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor who works with teens (age 16+) and adults experiencing ADHD, life transitions, grief and loss, trauma, anxiety, and self-esteem issues. Emily's warm and empathic style lends to a trusting and respectful therapeutic relationship with her clients. Her strengths based approach allows clients to gain insight, attain achievable goals, and create a fulfilling, joyful, and authentic life. Emily’s approach to therapy is integrative; she believes in addressing the spiritual, emotional, and physical needs of her clients so they may attain self acceptance and healing.  
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Saying Goodbye

3/20/2026

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Leslie "Les" Gura, LCMHC, NCC, CCTP

Psychotherapist

The spring equinox represents the passing of season, from the harshness of winter’s cold and early darkness to the brightness of warmer temperatures and longer days. Many people welcome this time of year with joy in their eyes and a spring (so to speak) in their step.

But it’s rarely that simple, is it? Some people are sad to say goodbye to winter. I’m one of them.

It’s not that I love the cold or snow – although the storm that dumped 6 inches on us the last day of January was the most beautiful in my 23 years in North Carolina. It’s just that this time of year reminds me of two difficult dates in my life. My dog, Nilla, the most gentle, perfect canine ever, died on March 17, 2023. Thanks to social media, I am reminded of that day constantly this time of year. And April 2 will mark what would have been my father’s 106th birthday. My best friend and most important influence has been gone for nearly 44 years.

In other words, when I think about the onset of spring, my mind goes to those two huge losses. My throat is tightening as I write this blog.

The thing is, treating grief is an essential part of counseling. And my lived experience informs and strengthens my work with clients who are grieving. Some don’t even know it because grief, though centered on loss, is not always about death. Often, I will gently point out to clients that their anxiety or depression over losing a job or breaking up with a partner is actually the way they are experiencing grief.

Regardless of the type of grief, how do you recognize it? Here are a handful of ways:
  • Not wanting to get out of bed.
  • Lashing out at others (especially loved ones) over minor issues.
  • Overeating.
  • Using substances.
  • Feeling a constant ball of anxiety in the pit of your stomach.
  • Struggling to fall asleep because of racing thoughts.

And how do we learn to manage grief’s symptoms? It starts with recognizing a loss, because once we accept we have suffered one, we can begin to grieve it more openly.

My father’s death in 1982 was shattering because it came out of the blue; he had appeared at age 62 in the best shape of his life. I was just 22 and didn’t know how to shed tears, much less grieve. It took seven years, when the 1989 movie Field of Dreams was released, before I grieved my dad’s death. At the end of the movie, Kevin Costner’s Ray Kinsella turns around in the twilight to see his father emerge from the cornfield and they get to play catch. In the darkened theater, my throat caught. I could barely breathe. And, oh, I felt hot tears rolling down my cheeks more quickly than I could wipe them away. My wife noticed. And for the first time, I was able to share the pain of my dad’s death with another person.

Flash forward 34 years and grieving came easily, but no less painfully, when I recognized my dog, Nilla, was in decline. In October 2022, I chose to get ahead of the grief to come by through a series of daily social media posts honoring Nilla, sharing fun, nostalgic and poignant pics of my 14-year-old dog. Then, after she died, I let the immediate pain subside and eventually blogged about knowing when and how to make that awful, merciful decision about a beloved pet.
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There are many ways to manage grief. Here are a few ideas:
  • Have a trusted friend or loved one (or therapist) listen without judgment. Beware of those who attempt to problem-solve, make it about themselves, or become defensive.
  • Journaling can allow you to write out feelings and emotions that would otherwise be bottled up inside.
  • A gratitude list allows you to gently smile and recall kindness and love in your life.
  • Role play enables people who are grieving to act out emotions they are feeling, presumably with an empathetic partner or coach in the endeavor.

​Remember, if you find your throat tightening or eyes welling this season, let the tears flow. More than anything, grief is a process that, like the seasons, can be hard to predict.

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Les Gura
Author Leslie "Les" Gura, LCMHC, NCC, CCTP brings a unique, narrative-informed perspective shaped by nearly 30 years as a journalist focused on storytelling and social justice.

​Les specializes in trauma work, including EMDR, and is particularly drawn to helping clients process difficult experiences and reshape the narratives they carry. Les integrates multiple counseling approaches, grounded in presence, empathy, and deep listening.
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Growing Into the Woman I Wanted to Be

3/10/2026

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Brittany Proxmire, MA, LCMHC

Psychotherapist & Community Outreach Coordinator

March has always felt like a special month to me. Not only do I celebrate another year around the sun this month, but I also love the shift from winter to spring. The longer days, the warmer air, the sunlight. It feels like the world is waking up again. The sun brings out all the serotonin and somehow wakes up my soul, too.

More recently, I realized that March holds another important day, International Women’s Day,  which feels especially meaningful at this point in my life. I’ve been surrounded by strong, intelligent, and impactful women for as long as I can remember. I grew up in a female-dominated home, and now I work for businesses that are also largely female-led. When I really stop and think about it, the influence of these women has shaped so much of who I am today. There’s something deeply empowering about that kind of environment. A sisterhood where each person’s strengths, weaknesses, and individuality are welcomed and embraced.

When I applied to work at Banyan years ago, the fact that it was a woman-owned business really resonated with me. At the time, I was still shedding parts of my younger self. The timid, people-pleasing version of me that often stayed quiet or followed the lead of others. But deep down, I knew I wanted to grow into someone stronger. I wanted to be someone who could be unapologetically themselves. Someone who stands up for others, empathizes with people’s struggles, and leads with confidence rather than feeling the pull to simply follow. At 30 years old now, I can look back at who I was in the first few decades of my life and smile, because I know little Brittany would be so proud of me and would truly see me as an inspiration. I’m still growing and evolving, and am proud of it.
Looking at where I am now, I know that so many women before me helped make that possible. Women like Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Maya Angelou, Dolly Parton, and Rosa Parks, just to name a few. Their courage, creativity, and determination created space for others to find their voice.

If you ever visit our offices, you might notice that many of our therapy rooms are named after influential women throughout history. It’s a small but meaningful reminder of the legacy they’ve left behind and the paths they helped create for the rest of us.
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Who are the women who shaped you? The ones who modeled courage, compassion, resilience, or strength in ways big or small. For me, the most influential figures were the ones sitting beside me at the dinner table, cheering me on from the sidelines, or quietly reminding me that I am capable of more than I realized. Maybe they were the same for you.

And maybe that’s what International Women’s Day is really about. Not just celebrating the icons we read about in history books, but also recognizing the everyday women who inspire growth, encourage authenticity, and remind us to keep becoming who we are meant to be. I can confidently say that I’m surrounded by many incredible everyday women: my sisters, my friends, and my colleagues, who continue to inspire me in ways big and small.

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Brittany Proxmire
Author Brittany Proxmire, MA, LCMHC is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor specializing in pediatric therapy. With a warm and playful approach, she engages children and adolescents, providing evidence-based techniques like play therapy, art therapy, talk therapy, Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP), and other modalities. Brittany collaborates with families, offering insight and support, while empowering clients to make positive changes and discover their authentic selves. In Brittany's work with teens and young adults she utilizes cognitive-behavioral therapy and humanistic approaches to foster behavioral change and self-awareness. Brittany's ultimate passion is helping children, teens, young adults, parents and families find happiness, peace, and harmony.
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5 Tips for the Anxious Athlete

3/3/2026

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Sarah Vanderpool, LCMHC, NCC, LPSC

Psychotherapist

In addition to being a licensed psychotherapy, I am also a former competitive athlete and current coach. With the latter role, helping my athletes prepare for competition, both mentally and physically, is my job. But as parents, as coaches, and as athletes, what do we do when our brain becomes unmanageable and negatively affects athletic performance? While there is certainly no “one size fits all,” I’ve used my knowledge as a coach, parent, and mental health professional to compile what I think is a helpful list of things to consider for athletes who have pre-competition anxiety.

Feeling anxious before a big game or competition is completely normal, but when nerves start to interfere with your performance or enjoyment, it’s time to take action. Many athletes struggle with pre-game jitters, overthinking, or fear of failure, but with the right mindset and strategies, anxiety can actually become a powerful source of focus and motivation.
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​1. Fuel Your Body
Put good in, get good out. Athletes must properly fuel their body for optimal competition results. This includes proper nutrition throughout practices, days/hours leading up to, and after the main event. A well-fueled body performs better and recovers faster. See what Abby Olmstead, Registered Dietitian Nutritionist, has to say about fueling your body properly for competition: Fueling your Body for Game Day.


2. Be a Goldfish
Goldfish have a short memory — and that’s a good thing. Finding the mental toughness to shake off mistakes and stay focused on what is happening in the moment can be challenging, but practice makes permanent. Keep moving forward and focus on what’s next – you got this!

3. Visualization
Mentally rehearse success. Picture yourself performing confidently and skillfully. See it from a 3rd-person perspective (like you’re watching yourself from the stands) and from your own eyes. This is what people mean when they say “eat, sleep, and breathe your sport”. Utilize positive visualization any time you have a free moment and make it part of your pre-game routine.

4. Pre-Game Routine
Routine builds confidence and reduces nerves. Everybody’s pre-game routine might look a little different, but the goal is the same – train your muscle memory well before game time. Include sleep, nutrition, breathing, and visualization. Add music, positive self-talk, or a specific warm-up — whatever helps you lock in. If you’re not sure what to do, ask your coach and/or teammates for help. Or your trusty mental health therapist 🙂

5. Breathe
Slow breathing = calm body and clear mind. When anxiety rears its unwanted head, you’ll want to have some coping skills in your back pocket to help mitigate the frustrating effects anxiety can have on your body and your performance. When you can control your breathing, it helps regulate heart rate, which is directly impacted by anxiety. Slow your breathing, and make your exhale longer than your inhale. Try 4-7-8 breathing:
  • Inhale for 4 seconds
  • Hold for 7 seconds
  • Exhale slowly for 8 seconds
Pro tip: Struggle to exhale slowly? Hiss like a snake to control the airflow.

You have more power over your mind than you realize. So go, right now, and practice your breathing and visualization, and make a few notes on what a pre-game/competition routine might look like for you. In part two, I’ll talk more about managing adrenaline, and practicing for permanence, not perfection.

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Sarah Vanderpool
Author Sarah Vanderpool, LCMHC, NCC, LPSC is a Licensed Professional School Counselor and Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor. She specializes in working with children, adolescents, and college-aged adults. As a former competitive athlete, Sarah has a niche in sports psychology and enjoys supporting youth and adults who participate in both competitive and recreational athletics alike to overcome psychological obstacles such as stress, anxiety, concentration, confidence, anger, and depression.
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Fueling Your Body for Game Day

3/3/2026

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Abby Olmstead, MS, RDN

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist

Nutrition plays a crucial role in sport performance, but it doesn’t have to be complicated! Fueling for competition can be possible anywhere with any budget, amount of prep time, or level of cooking skill. As a registered dietitian nutritionist, I help people meet their nutrition goals in a way that is accessible and manageable with their lifestyle. This includes working with athletes on increasing nutrition quality and making sure they are getting the proper diet to maximize sport performance. Here are my top recommendations to help feel your best before and after the big game. 
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Every Day
Preparation for game day starts with your everyday food choices. Ensure you are taking care of yourself during practice and training sessions by eating enough food, and making sure you are getting a good balance of different food groups. Aim for about 55-60% carbs, 15-20% protein, and 20-30% fat in your diet. MyPlate is a good guide! Protein is getting a lot of hype these days, but don't go crazy on protein. To make sure you're getting enough for muscle building and repair, aim for around 1.2-1.5 grams per kilogram of body weight (remember, 1 kg = 2.2 lbs). Try to cap it at around 30 grams per meal. Variety in micronutrients is important, try to eat a rainbow! Different fruits and veggies have different vitamins and minerals which show in their color.

Hydration is key! Drink up, around 60-80 ounces of fluid daily. Remember hydration can be more than just water. Electrolytes, coconut water, milk, or juice all count!

The Night Before/Morning Of
Focus on keeping  it balanced! Evenly distribute your meal into thirds: ⅓ carbs, ⅓ protein , ⅓ fruits/veggies, with around a golf-ball-sized amount of fat. The night before an away game can be especially challenging with limited options. During travel games, packing snacks can be a game changer to fill nutrition gaps. Remember fast food can be balanced too!

The last thing anyone needs before a big game is an upset stomach. Stick with familiar foods to avoid any potential negative symptoms.

Before the Game
When you are 30-60 minutes before the main event, load up on easily digestible, simple carbs for quick energy. Think crackers, pretzels, granola bars, or low-fiber fruits like bananas, grapes, or applesauce. Also, remember that bananas are also an awesome source of potassium, which helps prevent muscle cramps!

Recovery Time
You might realize it, but after the game is nearly as important as before! Help your body recover with what you eat. Refuel with a mix of carbs and protein. Carbs refill your energy, and protein helps repair muscles, reduce soreness, and build strength. Also, fun fact: chocolate milk is a superstar recovery drink!

​By consistently utilizing these food and hydration strategies, athletes can not only perform at their best, but recover quickly and support overall well-being. Always keep in mind good nutrition isn’t just something that happens on game day, but every day in between!

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Abby Olmstead
Author Abby Olmstead, MS, RDN is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist focusing on developing healthy relationships with food, improving overall wellness through nutrition, management of food intolerances and allergies, eating disorder treatment, gut health, and more. She works with adults, children (age 5+), and families to help create the best possible health outcomes for each individual person. 

Abby is a Health at Every Size (HAES) advocate, utilizing Intuitive Eating and positive nutrition models to improve nutritional health without fear, shame, or judgement. She is a believer that “all foods fit”, and passionate about helping people increase confidence with food choices, improve body image, and reestablish a connection with food as a part of culture and social interrelation.
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Through a Child’s Eyes: What If They’re Not Acting Out But Learning?

2/27/2026

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Gregoria Arreola-Meza, MS, LCMHCA, LPSC, NCC

Psychotherapist

Recall a time when you were expected to know how to do something without any prior knowledge. How did you feel? You may have felt confused, frustrated, or even hurt by the implication that you should have known something you didn’t. In my work with children in therapy,  I continually challenge myself to understand that a child's approach to a situation is shaped by the skills they possess at that time. As adults, we may unconsciously label children's behaviors that do not align with our expectations as attention-seeking, mischievous, or overreacting to situations.

We might think to ourselves, "Why would you think that was a good idea?" To challenge this perspective, I’d like to share an anonymous quote I once stumbled upon: "The sooner we let go of the expectation that children are capable of adult-like behavior, the easier it will be to tolerate their mistakes." I recognize how difficult it can be to understand why children do not always consider consequences before acting on their emotions. I invite you to reflect on the times when we, as adults, have struggled with this ourselves. It can indeed be challenging.
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By removing the adult lens, we may realize that children are not seeking attention, but rather connection. They may not intend to be mischievous; instead, they might simply be struggling to use conflict-resolution skills they have never been taught. Additionally, what we perceive as overreactions may simply reflect a child’s current level of understanding. It would be unfair to expect someone to know something they are not familiar with. 

Through my work, I have learned that when a child shares their experiences with me, it is their way of expressing "I promise I am trying my best… with what I know.” By approaching their stories with curiosity, non-judgment, and empathy, I am able to create a space where trust and learning can begin. This may involve helping children identify positive versus negative choices, distinguish a positive consequence from a negative one, and express which emotions may arise when deciding one over the other. By striving to view a child's story through their eyes, I come to understand behavior as a cue for growing and learning rather than as attention-seeking, mischief, or an overreaction. 

How would you navigate a world that expects you to know it all if you never had a chance to learn it?

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Gregoria Arreola-Meza
​Author Gregoria Arreola-Meza, MS, LCMHCA, LPSC, NCC is a bilingual (English and Spanish) Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Associate and Licensed Professional School Counselor in North Carolina who works with children, adolescents, and adults, providing empathetic support that helps clients build healthy coping skills and expressive outlets while honoring each person’s story, identities, cultural background, values, and lived experiences.
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"You Don’t Look Sick:" How Stereotypes and Weight Stigma Create Barriers to Eating Disorder Recovery

2/23/2026

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Abbey Lefko, MA, LCMHCA

Psychotherapist

When you think about an eating disorder, what does it look like? Does your brain immediately render an image of an emaciated girl with pale skin and bones protruding? If so, you are not alone: many people think that they can visually identify an eating disorder. Yet, the data shows that only 6% of individuals diagnosed with eating disorders are medically underweight, meaning 94% of people struggling with eating disorders are at or above a ”normal weight” (Flament et al., 2015).

The narrative that eating disorders have a particular look prevents people who don’t fit into that specific box from seeking and receiving treatment. The boogie man here isn’t the eating disorder, but instead is the weight stigma that is so pervasive in our society that we are missing the eating disorder entirely. 

Weight stigma is the discrimination of people based on their body weight and size and it stems from the belief that being fat or overweight is a moral failure. It stems from the assumption that a person’s body size is fully within their control, therefore if they are fat it is their actions and inactions that caused them to be that way.

So, if you can’t tell if someone has an eating disorder by looking at them, how can you tell if someone is struggling with disordered eating? Below are some noteworthy signs, but please know this list is not inclusive of all warning signs.


Behavioral warning signs:
  • Sudden changes in food preferences (refusing to eat certain foods, eliminating whole food groups, drastic diet changes)
  • Going to the restroom immediately after eating
  • Avoidance of situations involving food
  • Repetitive body checking behaviors (pinching, frequent weighing of self, excessive time spent looking in mirrors)
  • Social withdrawal
  • Food rituals (eating foods in certain orders, excessive chewing, overuse of condiments, rearranging food, cutting food into small pieces, etc.)
  • Continual denial of hunger
  • Sudden changes in exercise behaviors

Psychological warning signs:
  • Preoccupation with body shape, weight, and physical appearance
  • Intense fear of gaining weight
  • Preoccupation with food and activities relating to food
  • Heighten anxiety or fear around meal times
  • Moodiness and irritability
  • ​Body image dissatisfaction/distorted body image
  • Rigid thinking patterns (viewing everything as either “good” or “bad”)

Physical warning signs:
  • Noticeable fluctuation in weight, both up and down
  • Sensitivity to the cold
  • Gastrointestinal complaints (stomach cramps, acid reflux, constipation)
  • Lightheadedness/dizziness (especially upon standing)
  • Fatigue
  • Signs of frequent vomiting (swollen cheeks, red marks on knuckles, dental problems)

As a society we have to start working toward unlearning the harmful stereotypes about eating disorders because regardless of what some might think, eating disorders do not discriminate. Eating disorders impact people of all ages, genders, races, and body sizes, but if we think of eating disorders as only impacting the overly thin young white woman, we make it harder for those who don’t look like her to be taken seriously and receive the treatment they need to recover. Eating disorders will continue to be the most deadly mental illness, second only to opioid addiction, unless we stop perpetuating the narrative that there is a “look” that denotes the presence of an eating disorder.  

Recovery becomes more possible when we challenge the belief that eating disorders have a certain “look.” When we reduce weight stigma and listen with curiosity rather than assumption, more people are seen, believed, and able to access care. Eating disorder recovery is not measured by body size but by healing one’s relationship with food, body, and self. No matter how someone looks on the outside, their struggle is valid, and recovery is always possible.
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February 23rd to March 1st, 2026 is National Eating Disorder Awareness week! To learn more visit NEDA’s website www.nationaleatingdisorders.org 

References
Flament, M. F., Henderson, K., Buchholz, A., Obeid, N., Nguyen, H. N. T., Birmingham, M., & Goldfield, G. (2015). Weight status and DSM-5 diagnoses of eating disorders in adolescents from the community. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 54(5). https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaac.2015.01.020

Author, Abbey Lefko, MA, LCMHCA is currently accepting new clients and welcomes individuals seeking support for eating disorder recovery and body image concerns. If you or someone you know could benefit from compassionate weight-inclusive care, reaching out is a meaningful first step. Book by clicking Abbey's name below.

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Abbey Lefko
Abbey Lefko, MA, LCMHCA is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor Associate who works with individual clients aged 13+. She has experience working with a variety of client concerns and has specialized training in the treatment of eating disorders. Abbey’s approach to therapy is affirming, relational, and holistic. She works collaboratively with her clients to help them gain awareness, insight, and skills to live a more fulfilled life. She firmly believes that healing comes from a place of deep understanding and insight and strives to get to know each client as a unique individual. Abbey draws from several different therapeutic modalities to individualize her interventions to the unique needs of her clients.
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Kindness in the Small Moments

2/17/2026

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Alexa Brenner DeConne, ​MSW, LCSW

Psychotherapist

Kindness does not always show up as a big, dramatic moment. More often, it lives in the ordinary gestures that weave through our day, the small choices we make that help someone feel seen, supported, or cared for. These moments are easy to overlook, but they are also easy to practice. When we pay attention, we begin to notice just how naturally kindness can be incorporated into our daily routines, not as something scheduled or planned, but as a genuine response to the people around us.

If we take a moment to reflect, we may not realize how often we practice small acts of kindness, even daily. Kindness can show up by checking in on a friend or family member; whether that means sending a message, giving them a call, or offering to do an activity together. It can also show up in the way we listen without planning our response, or in choosing to pause and think before speaking too quickly. 
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A phrase that often comes to mind, and one I have been using frequently, is “water someone’s flowers, not their weeds.” It is a reminder to focus on people’s strengths and positive qualities rather than their weaknesses or flaws. When we acknowledge what someone is doing well, we help encourage growth, confidence, and connection. This simple shift in perspective can be a powerful and tangible act of kindness.
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As we practice kindness toward others, it is equally important to offer that same kindness to ourselves. What happens if we start to perform so many small acts of kindness that we forget how to prioritize ourselves? It is essential that you set boundaries for yourself, recognize when your battery is drained, and know when you cannot give to others. Understand that it is okay to not jump at every opportunity to perform an act of kindness and to release any guilt you may feel about it. Give yourself grace in performing acts of kindness and know your limits. You cannot pour from an empty cup, so know when to practice self-care and fill up your cup.
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We can never truly know what is going on in someone’s life. Small acts of kindness have the power to brighten someone’s day. You may never know the true impact a seemingly small act can have on someone. Kindness does not need to be grand or receive recognition; it can be small and something shared quietly between you and another person. What are some small ways you can begin to incorporate acts of kindness into your daily routine? 

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Alexa Brenner DeConne
Author ​Alexa Brenner DeConne, MSW, LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with extensive experience working with children ages 5 and up, teens, young adults, and adults across the lifespan. She creates a therapeutic space where clients can reconnect with their purpose, strength, and resilience. Her approach is collaborative and compassionate, drawing from a range of therapeutic models through a person centered lens while consistently validating and normalizing each client’s feelings. For those seeking a safe and supportive space to grow and heal, Alexa is honored to walk alongside them in their journey.
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Love as Courage: A February Reflection on Safety and Belonging

2/9/2026

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Autumn Martin, MA, LCMHCA

Psychotherapist

February is often framed as a celebration of love, complete with hearts, romantic gestures, affection, and connection. But February is also Black History Month, a time that invites us to remember that love has not always been freely given space to exist. History reminds us that for many, love itself has been something people had to fight for—defended, protected, and even legalized.

That history is not as distant as we might like to believe. It continues to shape how love is navigated today, often carrying a cost that extends far beyond legislation. Love has been shaped by power, fear, and courage, and that shaping influences how love is felt and experienced. Because of this, it is deeply important to honor how love shows up for us emotionally, mentally, and physically.

In 1958, Mildred and Richard Loving were married in Virginia, a union that violated the state’s laws criminalizing interracial marriage. To avoid jail time, they were forced to leave their home state. Still, they continued to fight for their love. This fight ultimately resulted in a landmark Supreme Court decision in 1967 that legalized interracial marriage nationwide.
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Photo Credit: Wikipedia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mildred_and_Richard_Loving)
Interracial marriage has only been protected by law for just over half a century. When love requires government regulation to exist safely, it raises an important question: how does that reality impact a person’s sense of safety, belonging, and even their nervous system?

When love exists under scrutiny, it doesn’t just live in the heart–it lives in the body, shaping how safe someone feels to move through the world. Lack of safety can feel like hypervigilance, mental and emotional fatigue, anxiety, or even loneliness.

In both clinical work and everyday life, these experiences often go unseen or unnamed. When people are asked to defend, explain, or justify their love, the nervous system remains on alert, making rest and ease difficult to access. Over time, this chronic stress can impact mental health, relationships, and one’s sense of belonging.

This is why remembering histories like Loving v. Virginia matters, not only as a legal milestone, but as a human one. It reminds us that love has often existed within systems that required endurance rather than ease. While laws can change, the emotional residue of living under scrutiny does not disappear overnight. Understanding this helps us approach love—not just our own, but others’—with greater compassion, care, and intention.

As we move through this month of love, let’s look beyond celebration and toward action. Lean into considering not just how we feel, but how we protect, affirm, and stand beside one another. When love is met with belonging and safety, it has the power to heal. And when we choose to love with intention and courage, we help create a world where love no longer has to fight to exist.

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Autumn Martin
Autumn Martin, MA, LCMHCA is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Associate (LCMHCA) who specializes in perinatal/maternal mental health, women's health, anxiety, depression, trauma, and life transitions.. She believes there are seasons in life that require extra courage, and through therapy, we can cultivate that strength together. Drawing from her background in education, she creates a warm, genuine space where clients can explore their truths and reach their goals using a holistic, person centered approach that integrates mindfulness and cognitive behavioral techniques.
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Holding Grief and the Post Holiday Blues

2/2/2026

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Christine Ridley, MSW, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP

Psychotherapist

The holidays can be tough for some people, with a variety of emotions showing up. This holiday season, I felt some melancholy. My grandfather entered hospice. I watched my mother grieve her father. I spent time in a hospital room, a memory care unit, and by a hospital bed while others were celebrating togetherness. 
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How many of us find the joy of the holiday season difficult to hold while we are aware there is an empty seat at the table? Grief is many things and is not limited to the death of a loved one. Grief can also arise from the loss of a job, having to detach from a friend, ceasing contact with a family member due to their active addiction and not wanting to enable their behavior, experiencing the ‘empty nest’, or missing a previous time in your life that you cherished.
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A Swiss-American psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, coined the 5 Stages of Grief based on her work with terminally ill patients and they have been widely adapted to the framework of grief. Note that these stages are fluid and not linear. 
  1. Denial: “This really can’t be happening!” 
  2. Anger: “You don’t understand what I’m going through! Leave me alone!”
  3. Bargaining: “If only I insisted on driving myself, the accident never would have happened.”
  4. Depression: “There is no point to me hanging out with friends, I am too sad to participate.”
  5. Acceptance: “I cherish the time I spent with him and can find a way to move forward while holding space for grief at the same time.” 

​In my counseling work, I use a skill called dialectics from the Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) framework to hold grief. Dialectics is a philosophical framework in which two seemingly opposite truths can coexist. With grief, dialectics sounds like this: 
“I am devastated by their loss and I am relieved they are no longer in pain.”

“I am doing my best to cope and I still have a lot of room to grow in my healing.”

“I feel deep despair and I know there is hope for healing around me.”
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“I feel the heavy weight of sadness in my body and I can notice there is love around me.” 

​By holding two opposite truths at the same time, we are not invalidating that there is pain here, we are acknowledging the pain, while noticing what is around that pain, so that we can better move through the emotions without judgment, without pushing away the pain, and honoring it. 

I often encourage my clients to have a daily practice or ritual where they honor their grief. You may choose to have a sacred space where you sit daily. This is a space that is comfortable for you, whether it is outside on a park bench or inside your home in your favorite chair. You may set a timer for 15 minutes and light a candle.  Leaning into stillness, name your emotions, notice the physical sensations that may be there in your body, and honor them.
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For example, “I am noticing sadness here. Sadness feels like tears forming behind my eyes and heaviness in my chest. To honor this, I am going to let my tears flow, open up my chest, breathe in some calm and breathe out sadness. To honor the sadness I feel today, I am going to notice that while I am sad, I notice I am allowing myself to heal in brave ways.” Blow the candle out and this is the end of the practice. By allowing yourself time to have this practice daily, this prevents the build up of grief and allows for healing, one day at a time. May you find peace in your healing journey. 

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Christine Ridley
Author, Christine Ridley, MSW, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP, specializes in evidence-based assessment and treatment for ADHD while also supporting clients with anxiety, depression, and trauma. She provides targeted interventions for executive functioning challenges, emotional regulation, and time management difficulties. Christine builds trusting relationships while recognizing that ADHD looks different for everyone. She combines ADHD-specific strategies with evidence-based approaches and mindfulness to help clients understand their brains, build on strengths, and create sustainable coping tools and growth.​
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    Banyan Tree Counseling & Wellness

    We are a team of licensed clinicians with a holistic, strengths-based, and evidence-based approach. We offer counseling for people of all ages, life coaching, group therapy, educational consulting and advocacy, assessments, and dietary nutrition services.
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